Simple words I need to start taking to heart and living by!
I’d say this is the most important and most difficult part of my journey. I have a social anxiety disorder, so you can imagine that my record of dealing with things is a messy one. There’s a lot of crying, some yelling, and a lot of avoidance. My nerves seem to be a retardant to dealing with things and people properly. (ha!) Whether you can relate to my anxiety or just have a hard time dealing and reacting to certain situations, there are steps we can take to better our experiences.
If we took a moment, just a moment, to step back from a situation and think before we reacted we would probably have the ability to deal a whole lot better!
Here are some helpful tips to put into action when you find yourself in a situation where you feel you’re going to react negatively :
1) Take a couple deep breaths
-slow down your heart rate and ease yourself out (when we’re stressed we tend to have fast paced shallow breaths which can cause even more stress.)
2) Believe in yourself
-a lot of times we tend to not know how to deal with a situation because of self doubt.
-trust yourself and your ability (you can do this!)
3) Stop Comparing
-do NOT compare anything about yourself to other people.
-nobody has your mind body and soul and therefore every single person’s experiences & dealing mechanisms will be uniquely different.
4) Think about the big picture
-how you react to a situation in the moment can determine your future (a falling out with a person, a job, a dream etc.)
-attempt to take yourself out of the moment and picture the outcome of your reaction.
-visualization can be very effective in achieving your goals 🙂
5) Stick up for yourself, but genuinely, not because of your ego
-sometimes people need to be put in their place if they’re effecting you negatively
-try to refrain from saying things you may later regret, but make sure your feelings are known… otherwise you’re doing yourself a disservice.
6) Remove yourself from the situation
-leave the situation and in some cases, kick these people causing you grief out of your life. (applicable depending on the situation, of course)
7) Kill them with kindness
-if these are situations and people that are inevitably going to be crossing your path, leave a smile on your face and be the bigger person.
-it’s such a powerful feeling to not let things get to you, or at least not let people know.
8) Think about all of the positives in your life
-know that you have other things in life to make you happy, friends, family, a support system…. this person or situation doesn’t define you and although it may make you rage, don’t let your reaction define you, either.
Self control is the essence of truly dealing.
Push through it all, to get to where you want to be. It’s all up to you. (and me!)